I can feel the Christmas atmosphere is getting warmer now. Jingle Bell was played in Ngiu kee when i went there yesterday. Well, i prefer The First Noel.
I am so cannot wait for Christmas this year. I dunno why. Previous years, my Christmas just like any other days, nothing is special.
Indeed my family doesn't really celebrate Christmas like a normal Christian would have. In fact, we don't celebrate anything, not even our birthdays. Sigh.. If only my dad knows the meaning of celebrating special days, it would makes us feel that we are special..
I remember the only one who ever celebrated my birthday was my mom. Miss her. She used to buy cakes for us. There would always a cake, with our names on it, telur merah, mee, fried chicken and some candies. It is like a small party for the close families. My cousins, Karen & the brothers, and also our neighbours would be the faithful visitors to sing "Happy Birthday". Haha.. Sweet memories. It were just simple parties, but we were so happy.
The only birthday party i had with friends was when i was in primary 4 or 5. I saw my friends celebrating their birthdays in KFC, Sugarbun, or just in the classrooms. They got so many presents. I was so jealous. Then i told mummy, i also want a party for my birthday. And she made one for me, in KFC. She told my dad, and my dad agreed too. I was so happy,so i invited the whole classmates to the party. It cost my dad about RM300 ++, i think. At the last minute, i got an extra friend coming to the party, That time i was so scared that my dad wouldn't have enough money to pay for it! I was so sad thinking about it, then i told myself, "nevermind la, i can spare my meal, and gave it to her, so that we no need to add another meal. I would pretend that i am full." Haha.. Of cuz, just 1 extra meal wont cost much, just a silly thoughts of mine. I was so happy that time. I think that is the last party thrown for my birthday.
Back to Christmas, I hope someone comes to my life and make a change. I want to celebrate Christmas!!! I want to embrace the true meaning of Christmas, and feel the joys it brings.
Talking about The First Noel,it reminds me of someone. Hope my phone will be vibrating for joy on that day, at least a Christmas Greeting. I swear i wont ignore.
That is my hope for this Christmas. But i am emotionally ready not to get anything, cuz i know the chances is so little..
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